“Perfectionism and Gifted Adolescents.”
Goal
My goal this semester is to improve my relationship with my teenage son. I believe that if I can understand some of his thinking processes, he and I will experience improved communication. He is a perfectionist and this characteristic manifests itself in our interactions. I am trying to understand perfectionism, in order to relate to him better.
Introduction
This study examined “the connection between perfectionism and gifted adolescents” (Schuler, 2000). Over the years, deciding whether perfectionism is a positive or negative trait has been debated. The purpose of the study was to “investigate the perceptions these students have of influences in their environment that might contribute …show more content…
Since the purpose of the study was to explore the perceptions and beliefs of perfectionism and what influences this mind-set, the results were extensive and varied. Interestingly, the perceptions of normal perfectionists seemed to include positive traits. Their characteristics included “lower concern over mistakes, average personal standards, lower parental expectations, lower parental criticism, and average doubts about actions” (Schuler).They also had the highest order and organization scores. Those considered neurotic perfectionists had scores showing “the highest concern over mistakes, personal standards, perceived parental expectations, perceived parent criticism, and doubts about actions” (Schuler). Influences on perfectionism were found to be self, school, family and community. The study stated that “the consequences of being perfectionistic affected the participants in three overlapping areas: interpersonal relationships, school life, and the future” (Schuler).In the discussion of the consequences many of the students expressed ways in which their perfectionism was mostly positive and healthy for them, although most acknowledged some unhealthy aspects. Most in the study struggled with schoolwork done in groups, “especially for those who had a strong sense of fairness” (Schuler). Many felt that they were …show more content…
With this knowledge I hope to be able to help him “appreciate, understand and cope” (Schuler, 2000) with his perfectionism. I hope to use this information to show more compassion and understanding when he is frustrated and angry. I hope to communicate with him in such a way that I do not add any perceived expectations or criticism to what he may already have in his mind. He puts enough pressure upon himself so I want to avoid adding any more, real or perceived. I want for him the ideal the author stated, “When gifted adolescents become aware of the healthy aspects of their perfectionism, they may no longer be ashamed of their personality trait and may appreciate how positive perfectionism can be”