In the story the male's primary focus was on his career and how they are doing financially. Though it was …show more content…
Women expressed how they felt through the secret language of nu shu. Nu shu was a language created a long time ago to allow women to express how they felt to family, sworn sisters, and/or their laotong. During this time period women were not allowed to write because in men's opinion that was not necessary. Though men did know about nu shu. This was a key to the separation of men and women because it shows who was able to show their true emotions, men. The idea of nu shu was thought to be simple nonsense, so men never bothered with it. In the nu shu Lily and Snow flower expressed their feelings of their lives and talked about the separation between men and women. Lily writes to Snow Flower and tells her about how she never see’s her husband unless he is coming to look at the baby in the morning (see, 152). This gave them a chance to talk about inner realm issues. They talk about their chores and how their children are growing …show more content…
They are to live separate live and they come together, when it is dealing with bed time. The women are to spend most their time in upstairs chambers. The men never go in there because that is the women’s space. The men felt that the women’s only duty in life was to produce a son to that will take on the name and if the women could not do that then they were worthless. The women was in charge of taking care of the house. The men and women are held at different standards. As stated before the women were to follow the Three Obedience, they were to also follow the Four Virtues. This is being careful how you act, like not being too sexual; being careful what you say, like not to disrespect your husband; carriage, like not being a distraction; and occupation, which is your house work (See, 24). While the men were held to a different standard, which was the the Nine Consideration. The men would be clearheaded, listened, carefully, appeared affable, loyal, respectful, righteous, and level headed. (See,165). These show that the women’s standards were to please the men, while the men’s. In the book it seemed as if the women wasn’t needed in the household to begin with, unless it was for cleaning. They were seen as guest, in the chinese language wife means guest. This means that she would always be a guest in her husband's home (See,