As human beings, one of our most valuable attributes is our ability to show empathy, to understand and relate to another person. To put yourself in their shoes, with the goal of understanding their feelings and their views.
The question then becomes how do we do this? How do we build, maintain and benefit from our everyday encounters and relationships?
and the answer is simple.. to ACTIVELY listen!
These 5 tips will hone your Active listening skills and take your life, both personally and professionally, to the next level.
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Pay close attention to what your peer, spouse, boss or whoever is saying. During your interaction, consciously remind yourself that the goal is not to interrogate but to listen. Not to talk but to listen. Not to make assumptions but to listen. Actively use body language:
--Nod occasionally --Smile and use other facial expressions -- Note your posture and make sure it is open and inviting -- Encourage the speaker to continue with small verbal comments like yes, and uh huh.
While you gather this intelligence, you will continue to learn more and more about the person you are speaking with and this will allow you to build a strong, lasting rapport.
2. Ask targeted questions. Guide your interlocutor to reveal more and more information by framing questions that start with What and How. This technique is very simple and so highly effective yet it is so often underused.
Examples: Do you like their business strategy? (Close Ended Question — can be answered by either a simple “Yes” or “No”) vs. What do you think about their business strategy? (Open Ended Question — requires the person to answer the question in more detail) Did the hurricane effect you? vs. How did the Hurricane effect you?
(if you feel you say what and how too much, you can use: Tell me about …? Please further …show more content…
They will then begin to lower their guard and reveal more information that may eventually help mend the issue.
5. Summarize. Recap and summarize what your interlocutor has just told you. Don’t assume that you fully understand what they have said. Recite a brief restatement of the core themes raised in the conversation.
The goal is to get whomever you are speaking with to say — -> “That’s right.”
This may seem funny at first but it will allow your spouse, boss, friend, whomever, to verify that you fully understand what he/she has said and if you do not, they will be able to elaborate.
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The Art of Active Listening is just that.. to listen.. to show empathy.. and to really understand the goals, feelings, and views of that person. This ability to actively listen will create strong, honest, and flourishing relationships that will lead to a fulfilling and successful life both personally and